I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, rise13eyond You deserve to be listened to. I'm so sorry you don't have a support system IRL. It's hard for other people to understand MI if they don't have it. I'm sure many people can relate to what you wrote, especially those here on PC. You're definitely not alone in this. Do you see a therapist? Maybe that could help. You could learn new ways to deal with your emotions. You would have someone that could listen to you. I'm so sorry, it must be very hard for you. It's always painful when this comes from the people that should be the closest to us. Please don't give up. If it can help a bit... we're here for you. We'll listen to what you have to say. We care about you. We all love you here. You know we won't judge you. I know it's not the same thing as having a support system IRL, but at least it's something. I'm here for you if you want to talk about it. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this