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HD7970GHZ
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HD7970GHZ "Primum Non Nocere"
 
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Default Feb 24, 2019 at 12:01 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
I am sorry for your trauma and I believe you when you say you were traumatized. Something that is nagging at me though is.. is there any chance your perceptions of things are a little off or skewed? I am not trying to be disrespectful or invalidating- what I mean is due to your mental illness and the abuse you suffered is it possible that you were looking at all things through the same filter? Almost like a bunch of things happened and because the abuse was so pervasive it seemed like every single thing that followed was part of a plot or that the world was going against you? I ask because I know that when I have been mentally unwell Certain things might happen and it seems that they pile on top of each other one by one. Without an objective eye because I was hurting and suffering I was unable to see things that maybe I was a part of or that maybe my perception of them was a little slanted. I hope I am explaining myself right. The trauma is real. The pain is real. The abuse is real and the mental illness is real. But maybe things that seem one way, are not that way? Like maybe your neighbor really did carelessly toss the cigarette rather than deliberately setting fire to your fence? What reason would she have for burning your fence?

Hi SarahSweets,

I have to stand up for the OP (Marilyn) of this thread and say that your questioning the perception of a survivor is NOT supportive and is borderline abusive. When I read your post I actually got triggered too. I know what it is like when people use a mental illness against you in order to silence and or gaslight / distort reality. There is a word for it: Mentalism and or Sanism. I recommend looking those up.

While I understand your method of thinking, I can say for myself that I have been grossly invalidated by many abusers in the past. Nothing hurts worse than placing your heart on the table only to be met with similar mistreatment to the initial traumas. This is what is called invalidation and it can lead to secondary traumas. The OP is correct in asserting that this post is no different than abusers. (Not saying that you are an abuser, just being completely transparent and hoping you can learn from this).

On a side note:

Did you know that in regards to trauma, those who have been traumatized once are MORE likely than the general public to LEGITIMATELY re-experience the exact same trauma? Look up the Repetition Compulsion and Self Fulfilling Prophecy. Those terms should help shed light on what I am talking about. They are well documented and proven phenomenon's surrounding Trauma survivors, just like victim blaming and shaming. It is statistically proven and you can read about it in the (arguably) best literature for complex PTSD:

Complex PTSD: Surviving to Thriving - (Pete Walker)
Trauma and Recovery - (Judith Herman)

I am deeply saddened that survivors are treated this way on forums. This should never happen but unfortunately it is clear evidence that society has a long way to come before being able to effectively help and support those with trauma and mental illness.

Marilyn, I truly empathize with you. I experience this same mistreatment consistently from the same 6 people on this forum. You are not alone and please feel free to message me anytime you need support!

Thanks,
HD7970ghz

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Thanks for this!
Marylin