So it's been around 6 weeks since I learned of his death and what a roller coaster ride it's been!
My bipolar started cycling every couple of days or so, my depression was horrific and all the old stuff like nightmares and 'seeing' him...it all came back. It was as if my sub-concious suddenly became a waterfall and all this "stuff" started just pouring out of me and I was powerless to make it stop.
Now it seems better, I've stopped cycling - for now. Gee, I can't wait till my mom dies. I imagine it will be much worse.
For now, I'm good. Thanks everyone!
WW