We use those cards for my disabled sibling sometimes, it can be helpful. Worth a try

Sounds like an ok session. I would say, and this is just a suggestion, feel free to ignore it but since you already know so much of your issues come from childhood/mom and you sadly can't change any of it.... maybe try to work on things to help you going forward. Like to help you break these patterns and things. I only know of CBT and DBT off hand but there is probably other things. I know my childhood was crap but I try my best to focus on how to better my future. I'm unsure if any of the things I specifically do are CBT or DBT.

Still suggest trying to talk to H about MC, I really think it would benefit you guys. Even if you see a female of his choosing this time. Maybe one without outside contact or something that would help him feel more at ease about going.

Maybe you can keep a journal of your insights you have, and bring it in to your regular sessions or email them once in a while. That could be a good thing too try and work on too. None of us are perfect, so I'm not trying to pick on you or anything, we all are flawed and that' ok and I do support you... I'm just trying to suggest things that can help you going forward, since you have recently talked about wanting to depend less on T and things like that, which is great. I wish you all the best in your journey. Really and truly.

It's ok to be independent, seeing back up T was a great idea and it seemed to really help. Try not to be so hard on yourself about it. Imagine all the things other people have said to your T in his career, sometimes even to his face, I am sure he can handle it.... you do you.