Well that’s a great turn of events!!!

Separation is the hardest part. The other hardest part is learning to live life without having the abuser live as a shadow on your shoulder yelling in your ear every time you think about making a decision. I separated 18 months ago and it’s been hard evicting the shadow—and there’s no reason I need to worry about what she’ll think... except... I became so used to thinking that way... 24/7 ... and when I forgot there was hell to pay so it had to be 24/7...

In some ways living with an abuser is a great distraction because I had no opportunity to think about anything else except the chaos around me. But freedom means I have the opportunity to heal. Yeah, it’s a little lonely at times, and I look around and think that at 58 I should probably have had other plans in life, but here I am and it’s so much better than it was 2 years ago.

The other stuff —that happens little by little...