Mar 14, 2019 at 11:44 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MotherHen
Anatta, when I read your post I just had to respond. I am the partner of someone with BPD. He suffers from severe abandonment issues and we have been working on this extensively lately. Whenever anything irritates me or I express an interest in an activity that doesn't include him, he becomes dissociated and detached which then leads to the abandonment spiral.
I just want to reassure you and everyone else out there, that abandonment issues are a very real thing and that as a couple you CAN work through them together. I have to constantly reassure my husband that I am here and committed and always willing to hear his feelings - that is MY JOB as his partner. His job is to be honest about how he is feeling - my job is to make sure that he understands that I am not going anywhere and that we BOTH have space for our feelings and needs.
It's a tough road - this abandonment thing. I have had to become understanding in ways that I did not know I had within me. Love is inspiring in it's own right, though, and you can find it with honest communication - I truly believe that. All the best to you!!!
|
What a touching and inspiring post! Thank you so much for sharing! I'll give my boyfriend a hug now
__________________
"Are we not all hungry ghosts chasing the phantoms of our choice?" - Alexander Lazarus Wolff
“Live or die, but don't poison everything.”
-Anne Sexton
“If with a pure mind a person speaks or acts, happiness follows them like a never-departing shadow.” - The Buddha
|