Hi Ennie. Great post! Interesting questions!

As far as the external goes, I think beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Some men are attracted to "curves" and some are not. What I think can be dangerous is to conflate our sense of Self or value with our external appearance. The two actually have nothing to do with each other. I have personally known men and women who most people would describe as stunning or incredibly handsome and they were actually deeply insecure and unhappy when I got to know them as friends.

So why do we often conflate external appearance and worth or happiness when they are actually unrelated? Because we live in a consumerist society which tells us so in order to sell us things. You cannot sell someone a product without first convincing the buyer that they need it. How do you convince them that they need it? You tell them they are deficient in some way. Too big? Here's a diet plan and weight loss product and gym membership for you. Too thin? Here's a work-out program and weights and gym membership for you too. Too pale? Here's self-tanner or a tanning salon. Too dark? Here's a bleaching service. Wrinkles? Here's a cosmetic procedure or anti-wrinkle cream. Bumpy armpits? (seriously, that's a thing according to Dove) Here's a special antiperspirant that will smooth them out. Etc Etc On and on it goes causing more and more harm to the self-esteem of humans. At some point, we need to train ourselves to stop listening. At least to some of it.

With regard to my body, I think about health. I want to maintain a certain weight and BP and cholesterol in order to decrease my risk for certain illnesses etc. I also practice daily gratitude and thank my body for the many functions it completes without even so much as a command from me: heart pumping, vision, hearing, synapses firing etc.

I think feeling "beautiful" comes from within....from good character and acts of kindness and helping.

As for you Ennie, I recommend choosing a weight that seems medically healthy for you, monitor your BP, cholesterol etc. Love and honor your Self and you'll find a loving and honorable partner if that is something you desire. Peace to you

Ps. This was a line in a song but I practice it faithfully: DO NOT READ BEAUTY MAGAZINES, THEY WILL ONLY MAKE YOU FEEL UGLY!