Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes
What you have shared is that you live your life around your husband and his drinking. It's ALL about him.
YES! Get this job and choose to do things for YOURSELF. Instead of saying "will he let me get this phone?", say "I am going to get myself a new phone". Instead of saying "will he let me get the sleep I need?" choose to say, "I am going to make sure I get the sleep I need!". If he gets drunk and wakes you up if you sleep in the same bed? Set up a place you can sleep by yourself so he can't disturb you. You don't set up any boundaries with him.
|
I like this advise.
I want to add, when you start setting new boundaries, he may at first be upset but if he stays upset and does not show he is willing to be considerate then he is not loving you the way you deserve. When we set boundaries, it reveals what people really are. When we don't, some of what we think of others may be exaggerated because of our own personal fears. Express to him how you truly feel and decide what you deserve and stick to it. If he does not honor it or talk it out (you both come to a compromise or at least respect the others autonomy) then you don't want to be in this relationship. Also, sometimes the genuine threat that you will leave makes people change because they realize that you will not stay if they don't respect you more.....