Don't give up, negative self-talk is a had habit to break, alot of what you've said id negative self talk, it unlikely that you really know if people think you're an annoyance, this is probably your negative self talk again.

Have you tried re-framing the questions you have about yourself, one of the questions I ask my self everyday is what do I love about myself and I must come up with an answer.

Another one is who can I send a note of appreciation or gift to and I do it. You'd be amazed at the difference this makes in your relationships. There are things you can do to get out of this and you have a support network here if you need us