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Old 03-20-2019, 10:10 AM
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Default Re: Told guy I like him. He said he has a gf but keeps trying to talk to me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ss86 View Post
I met a guy a few months back on a night out through mutual friends of his, and I was immediately drawn to him. We chatted a good bit of the night, and after I left I added him on social media, because I felt we had a spark.

I commented on a few of his things, and messaged him to try and engage, but he never acknowledged anything so I figured maybe I read it wrong and just let it go. Fast forward a month and there is another night out at the bar and he is there with friends. He comes up to me and introduces me to them, and we chat again. I end up leaving before him very drunk, and stupidly text him after leaving telling him I would love to get dinner with him because I am into him. He replies telling me he loves the compliment but he is with somebody (which sucks because there is nothing on social media that hints at this).

So I get my closure, let it go and try and move on....only ever since I told him I like him he hasn't stopped commenting on my social media, which he hasn't done before (5 times in a week), and then the other day he even messaged me directly making fun of a comment I had made about liking something he doesn't, so his messaged said this is why we cant be together, but he was very playful and put a smiley face.

So now I don't really know what to do, because I left it alone after finding out he is not single, but ever since he has known I like him he keeps trying to engage. Should I feel bad for engaging, and do you think he is being out of order to his gf? I don't really know how to take his behavior, and he could maybe just want to be friends, but we have only met twice. Thoughts?

His commenting on your fb, in combination with messaging you and the way he is doing it, is entirely due to your professing that you're attracted to him. In my opinion his behavior while mild, is a yellow warning flag about him. It speaks volumes that he's taking the time to comment and engage with you when he already has a gf. Why? Because his whole attention is based on the fact that you're already attracted to him and it says to me that he, in spite of being involved is toying with other women in this way. Flirting off hand occasionally happens but this is intentional and purposefully done.


Best case scenario he's just enjoying your attention and means nothing by it but even so that's entirely unfair to you and is really an attempt to keep you on a string. Worst case, he's the type that now or eventually he will probably cheat on his gf and is that really the kind of guy you want to associate with?


My first wife, I met as she approached me and gave me her number, we were both young. I called her and then she mentioned she already has a bf. I told her straight up, "call me if you're single again" That was a mistake because she did, we ended up together, and pretty much the entire marriage of about 6 yrs, she cheated on me repeatedly before I finally had the solid evidence on it and called her out.


I only add my experience because people that are devoted and committed dont' play games with others that happen to have an attraction to them.
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