Thanks for this thread, Arbie! I want to know the subtle signs so next time I can run in the opposite direction BEFORE I get too involved and the damage is done.

It's much easier to stay away than to get away, because once you form a bond, they hold it against you if you distance yourself.

One of the subtle signs I noticed is lack of personal space. They stand uncomfortably too close to you and lock eyes with you (when do they blink??) like they are sucking you into the conversation. Now, I am not saying that everyone who stands too close and locks eyes with you are abusive. But if you see other abusive symptoms along with it, this could be a form of mental isolation.