I try to be positive and upbeat because really, the world needs more of that. One of my friends for instance. Who I've been friends with since I was 14.. told me a couple months ago that he could no longer be friends with me cause I'm going downhill to hard, I don't help myself and I don't listen to anyone.. this is when I was about a month sober, on the list to take my Cna test and calling around looking for possible employment. Obviously that wasn't enough to satisfy. And I guess I feel jaded cause I know what he does and he's not in active recovery, doesn't help himself, makes his wife do literally everything for him.. I dunno. Maybe he doesn't like seeing me dig my way out.. I know people are busy in their own lives. But if they have time to post and comment they have a minute to reply to me too. I guess I'm just sick of never being important enough in anyone's life to make any real impact.. ugh