Thread: Mean
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Anonymous45521
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Default Mar 22, 2019 at 06:44 PM
 
I relate. I have found as I got older I have a wicked mean streak. I don't know how to describe it to people. I wouldn't go out of my way to hurt someone, but I just have a more "tough" reaction to everything. A hunger to get out. It seems to me like it is a bit of a contrarian reaction. It isn't that I am mean, it is just that everyone else's reaction causes me to want to go the other way.

I am on my condo board and at the last annual meeting a resident actually yelled out that I was mean. But I didn't see it that way. NOT enforcing the rules is mean to those who comply without having to be told.

I like to watch shows like "Dexter" (even though I think Dexter is kind of like a super hero). Or Dietland where someone goes off the rails and hurts people who "deserve it" also, Sweet / Vicious.

I have thought it about it and if I was in a kill or be killed situation I know I would kill. I actually took a firearm course and was going to get a gun but decided against it out of fear I would shoot myself.

When someone who deserves it has their life destroyed (say by being convicted of a crime) I smile.

When a bad person dies a bad death (from say cancer -- I do enjoy knowing how they suffered). While everyone else seems horrified.

I have said many times when my former abusive boss dies I will spit on his grave and everyone recoils in horror like I have said the worst thing ever. But I have no apologizes.

I do believe some people deserve to die.

I like to say *truth* bombs all over the place - but most people think that *truth* these days is being mean. I don't see it that way.

I don't feel I have suffered abuse and maybe I have always been this way a little. When the Challenger disaster happened my first reaction was to just burst into hysterical laughter. It just was so ironic that after all the hype it spectacularly blew up on tv in front of the nation. Though of course I do feel bad and wish it had not happened... the overwhelming irony of the situation won out in my emotions.
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