This guy you explained as a friend? It's important that you discover what you consider safe simply because it's "familiar". This guy was not someone you should be gravitating towards as a friend, the familiar that stands out to me is his comfort in invading boundaries and how comfortable he is with yelling etc., around you. You were still young and naive in college when that happened. Keep in mind that remembering these different experiences doesn't mean you need to feel bad or guilty, it just means you made a choice that was not healthy for you and a lot of that had to do with just not knowing at the time and thinking it was normal because of your history and it was "familiar" to you.