i requested my notes from my T after ending six years of therapy with him. he had no issues giving them to me and he even offered to meet with me after i had reviewed them so we could discuss any concerns or issues i may have had.

i found it helpful to read his notes. many of the session notes were quite detailed and some where short and simple. while i was in therapy, i kept my own detailed notes of my sessions in my personal journals and i referred to them often to compare to his notes. there were occasions where he had completely misanalysed me or issues i was trying to communicate to him or his interpretations of what was going on were way out and incorrect, but there were times he was spot on and seemed very attuned to me. i found some of his misinterpretations of me a bit hurtful or even sometimes comical because they were so far off from the truth. but reading these misinterpretations in his notes completely validated an overall 'gut' feeling i had often been struggling with when i was in therapy and confirmed my belief that he did not truly understand or 'see' me for who i was.

we met casually, on two separate occasions, after i completed reviewing his notes and we openly discussed them. personally, i found it incredibly beneficial to do so. it provided us both an opportunity to discuss and revisit some aspects of those six years. i also found it quite healing post therapy, not only to have the chance to share my feelings about some of his misinterpretations, especially about feeling not being 'seen' and understood by him, but i also received an apology from him. in the time since finishing therapy and after our conversations, he has come to recognise and acknowledge some of the unhelpful and hurtful mistakes he made along the way. he sincerely apologised for those errors and i was deeply touched by his gesture.