View Single Post
Anonymous55879
Guest
Anonymous55879 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Mar 26, 2019 at 06:51 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nowinners View Post
Unfortunately, when I went back and edited, it wouldn't allow me to edit the title. I do have a mood disorder. I do not want to "tag" my son as MH because he has not yet been diagnosed with anything. I think mental illness is something you have to figure out for yourself with the help of all the information that is out there and someone educated in treating mental health illnesses. Sometimes we can hide our mental illness and not realize that we have a problem.

My H commends me a lot with coming so far (being more and more stable since my attempt). He is more positive than negative. I take a some of my frustrations out on him and sometimes he reacts negatively. He is only human.

But you are right, our family still has a lot of big problems that we need to work out. We were not working on the right problems for many years. The children are the ones who pay the price in these situations. I will always feel like I owe something to my children that I can never repay or undo because of my actions.
I said I do not want to characterize what is going on with my son and still believe that is the right thing to do. I am not a trained professional, am too emotionally enmeshed in the situation to be unbiased and am dealing with my own diagnosed issues. Yet there IS something going on, I just don't think it is fair to characterize it. There have been odd behaviors (will not be specific)--are they reasonable reactions to traumatic events (ALOT of traumatic things happen to you when you are homeless ) or does he have a serious underlying condition that emerged after HS but before getting kicked out?

Yesterday, during our walk, I stressed to my husband how inhuman it has been to let this go on. He stressed that we have no choice because of our son's actions and that things are getting better. I told him that from my POV, our son has not improved and if he has a mental illness, his homelessness is making it worse. I believe my H feels like there has been an improvement because I have improved and am not making the situation worse.

However, during the conversation, I felt like he used phrases that I have used in my posts. I am from a rural area out West end went to some very lax public schools so I sometimes use some pretty unsophisticated expressions like "woulda, shoulda, coulda" though my H may have picked up on this from conversing with me (this is not at all typical of how he speaks). So here I go again feeling a bit paranoid. When I feel that way I have learned to take my full medications.

After expressing exactly how I felt to H, it made me feel better but he was a real "bear" when getting ready for work this morning. I suppose he is entitled to have bad days too. I am keeping him in the loop regarding our son and it just is a very tough topic for us to deal with. It feels like a never ending nightmare sometimes......
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky, TishaBuv
 
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky