The magazine thing was nice, I know therapists do that stuff for clients often. That or book recommendations stuff. It's nice to know that thought popped in their head at some point.

I can understand the frustration with coping skills. It is like you want to be free of these feelings, you try them, they work briefly but then the thoughts come back. It's so limited and I feel you there. However, that's sadly mostly all you can do, is fine new ways to think of things or distract yourself.

I feel like you and your T get to this point often.... it's sad because it always causes you distress. He does not know how to handle strong attachment well and instead of helping you lessen things, it tends to make it worse in the end. It's why I worry about your frequent interactions with him. It may help temporarily, but then you will find yourself in this same pattern again and I get sad reading it.

I think for attachment, you will have to seek a session or two with someone else. Someone who can help you find ways to lessen it, having the strong feelings can be so draining. Adding in to it, the limits of therapy, I have been there and I understand how overwhelming it can be. I hope you are somehow able to become more secure with the relationship, less intensely focused on it and more focused on you and your journey.

Hopefully you can keep making the small strides though. You were doing awesome before and it was noticeable to many of us. There is bound to bumps in the road along the way. No doubt. Just know you have a lot of cheerleaders here on this forum, wanting to see you thrive and achieve the goals you have for yourself. You got this....

That being said, most of us relate to the frustrating limits of therapy. It sucks but it isn't something we can change. I am glad you felt some care from though. Maybe a suggestion, since you like to write, make a list of times you felt really cared for by him and when you struggle next time or worry he's rejected you or whatever, read through it, and remind yourself of those things.