Thank you both. I really appreciate you sharing your story as well with me, I'm sorry you went through that.
I hate that I've given her so much control over me with me making my whole life around her. I know I can do better and I hate myself right now because I feel stuck. I'm a very attractive guy with a nice paying job and no kids so I know I can find someone but it's the letting go I'm afraid of. I feel like I need to secretly get over her while I still have the comfort of her being around and I'm not sure how to do that without feeling like I'm cheating.
We just got off the phone and she just made it clear that she doesn't want to work on us while im trying my best to do extra things for us. Shes disquising me as controlling and maybe I am a little im just not ready for certain things in our current state....
Thank you so much though. This forum is really helping a lot because I'm on the edge