You’re not awful. You’re not all bad or all good. I always get the sense from your posts that you are motivated by a sincere desire to connect with others and be supportive.
I’m with you in that I recently was quite harsh and judgmental in a comment on a thread. I’m usually not like that. There were some negative things the OP did that triggered me to let him have it. I’m likely blocked too.
The only couple of times I’ve ever blocked anyone here was because I felt those people were really taking jabs at me, unnecessarily so. I was triggered one time by this person’s comment to a very deep depressive and dangerous episode. This IS a psych site. So, blocking was for my own safety to avoid harm.