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Default Apr 10, 2019 at 05:15 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by StreetcarBlanche View Post
1. I've had online female friendships. They each dumped me without even a prior warning. I was friends with these women for YEARS online and even spoke with them on the phone and Skype video chatted with them. But, in the end, I wasn't a friend they wanted to maintain contact with. It hurts but oh well.

2. Your friend is really self-centered in real life. People are the same online as they are offline. That is my personal experience with online friendships.

3. Depression is one of those mental illnesses that promotes self-centered coping skills with people, who are neurotic already. I suffer from severe anxiety sometimes, and have been called self-centered a few times in my life. My theory is, underneath someone's self-centered behavior, is someone who feels flawed, unworthy and emotionally vulnerable to others. Sometimes, I think that's how I feel underneath my anxiety -- I worry that people will take advantage of me if I let my guard down.

BUT....

People can still be a**holes despite their depression. I'm not an a**hole. I'm not saying your friend is an a**hole. But, you've clearly shown her that you support her during her tough times and she responds by ignoring you.

That's not a friendship I'd keep. But, that's just me. It sounds very one-sided: you do all the footwork, reaching out, responding, and she responds tepidly when/if she feels like it. Oh, I've had a few of those doozies myself -- one sided friendships are awful. Just awful.

If your gut's telling you to pull away from her then I'd follow your gut. The gut's never wrong. Like, never wrong. Sorry this happened to you. But sometimes we find out who our real friends are, and it's hurtful when their real intentions with us turn out not to be good ones.

Thank you so much.

Yes one-sided friendships are truly awful. I think you're right. I must pull away. What am I getting out of it except upset? It's dragging me down and is not enhancing my life anymore. And yes, I believe she must be self-centered offline as well. It's really too bad and unfortunate. She does have her nice qualities.

I'm so sorry those women treated you so poorly. That's just plain rotten human behavior in action. Terrible. It's a reflection on them, not on you.

Thank you for relating to my sentiments and experiences. I appreciate it!

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