Depression is insidious. It sneaks in and slowly takes over our lives. This is not your fault. I totally understand the inability to do those things when depressed. Is there anything at all that brings you even a tiny amount of joy? When I am depressed I sometimes drag myself to the beach. I rarely make it but when I do I experience a tiny, tiny amount of hope within the emptiness. We are here for you. Hang in there. Depressions do pass. If the people around you truely care about you they won't care about the state you are in and will instead accept you and not judge. Is there any particular person you trust to not judge you? If so, start with that person first. Maybe go out for a coffee near your flat if you can't have her/him over. Take care.