Quote:
Originally Posted by mattdadd
I've always had a hard time knowing whether I've gotten over a traumatic event, or if I've just repressed the memories/emotions related to it. My parents got divorced back in 2009, and I thought I've been over it for years, but I recently noticed that I start to cry when I think about it. Is this a normal thing? Is it possible to cry about something you've already come to terms with?
I guess the main question I have is how do you know when you've gotten over something? Is there a sign you recognise, or do you just feel it? Is it something you can just never know for sure?
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it is normal when thinking about sad things to feel sad and have reactions like crying...
let me show you something recently I went to a workshop, it was for treatment providers, survivors and any one. it was on depression and how the brain works. we were all asked to watch a video of three different things. one was someone having a great time. one was getting news that they were going to be a grand parent and another was of someone dealing with death / the grief process.
after each one we were asked to say what we were feeling emotionally.
on the great time / party video everyone said they felt happy, full of energy and would have liked to join that party.
on the pregnancy reveal we all stated we felt good and happy that the parents took the news great and enjoyed the reveal process and that it made us feel great / happy
on the death / grief video we all said it brought us down, made us feel sad and get teary eyed.
then we were asked to think about something happy and that brought up our moods again then we were asked to think about something sad in our lives and that brought us back down again.
the instructor explained that this was normal, its how the brain works. that it takes in everything that we are experiencing through our senses and emotions and causes physical reactions to those things. so next time we found ourselves crying from a tv show or thinking about something remind ourselves that we are normal and this is the normal brain response to what we are experiencing.
we also learned that we can stay stuck in this depression mode or we can make changes to our thoughts to bring us out of it.
suggestion if it bothers you that when you think about your parents divorce makes you cry, maybe remembering the good time and facts of why they got divorced will bring you back up.