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RDMercer
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Member Since: May 2013
Posts: 719
10 yr Member
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Default Apr 15, 2019 at 06:01 AM
 
Hi,

I'm just a guy who needs to talk for a minute. Yes, I have a counselor, but that one hour a month isn't enough.

My wife is sick, and has been for years. There are illnesses you can get that won't kill you, but will destroy your life and leave you in pain 24-7. That's us now for about 4 years or more.

Ive gone for long stretches raising the boys on my own, and caring for her, and holding down a job. She's had better and worse stretches, but she's been unable to work for 3 years now. No insurance for the lost income.

I'm aware, I'm still doing better than some. I have a good job that I'm good at. I have family connections, but I've kept them at arms length for a couple of years now. It becomes a violation of her privacy to talk too much about what's going on, and first and foremost it's her and I that are in this together. Also, my parents are old and my brother has had his own issues, and he's been good to look out for them. I don't want to burden them.

There's nothing to look forward to. We're slowly losing this fight. I can't keep up at work and home to this degree. Right before my wife got sick we invested a ton of money into her education. She was a year away from finishing when she became too ill.

She has bad days for pain. If you've lived it, or seen it, you know what that means. Days she'll lash out, days she begs me to leave her, days she says she's going to leave me, days she resents me for having health, and a career. Days on end like that before she might get a day of some relief.

Right now we have about a year of credit we can tap into before we lose our home... If we don't spend any money. Our home needs repairs, and so do our cars.

Hard decisions ahead.

And yet I know we're still doing better than some, and others, including many of you here are carrying bigger loads than I am.

These problems sound do small compared to some of your stories. I'm just struggling to carry this one the last few days.
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