Thread: being late
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WishfulThinker66
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Member Since: Jun 2018
Location: Canada
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Default Apr 15, 2019 at 11:16 AM
 
Thanks for your kind reply MickeyCheeky. All that you've said is valid and valuable.

You are right, no one actually said anything about my being late other than my brother asking if everything was alright. I still felt like everyone's eyes were upon me. That is how my mind always operates.

Had we been on time - had it been me in control I would have had us all seated well before the event - I wouldn't have had to go through this anguish. Not to mention too that I wouldn't have let anyone down.

I did as you suggested talk to my boyfriend and let him know I found his actions difficult for me. I told him it was not only unfair to me but to the people that were counting on me. I told him I wished to avoid this from happening again and how important it was to think ahead and form plans. He took this all in but I could tell he didn't appreciate my nagging I suppose. But I closed the conversation with a, "So we are in agreement that in the future we will try to plan better."

This was difficult for me as I shy away from confrontation at all costs.

Before this thread gets moved into the relationships section I would really like to hear from others who've had similar experiences and feelings about being late - at someone else's hand or their own/

Quote:
Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky View Post
I'm so sorry you've had to deal with all of this, WishfulThinker66! I completely understand what you mean! It's VERY hard to deal with all of this and it sucks when it happens, ESPECIALLY when you know it wasn't your fault to begin with! Did anyone actually tell you anything or scold you for coming late or was it just you feeling anxious? Either way, it's certainly NOT a pleasent experience! If anyone DOES ask you anything about it, I think it's just fair for you to just be honest with them and tell them what happened! Hopefully they'll understand that it wasn't your fault and that you did everything you could to come as soon as you can! Have you talked to your boyfriend about this? Does he know how anxious and upset that made you feel? I'd suggest to talk to him about this and see how it goes from there! Maybe that could help! Make him understand that you did NOT like how he behaved and that you've been feeling VERY anxious and upset because of all of this and that was something that was VERY important for you! Hopefully he'll listeno to what you have to say and understand what you mean! Hopefully he'll try to do better next time! Can I ask you how is your relationship with him otherwsie? Does he respect you? Do you both get along with each others? I know this isn't what you've asked. These are just some thoughts that you may want to think about, if you WANT of course! If these questions are bothering you, I immensely apologize to you and feel free to ignore them completely! Either way, please remember that it WASN'T your fault and that you did everything you could! That's what matters! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! I'm sure you know that already but please keep repeating yourself that everytime you're feeling anxious or if you're having ANY doubts about yourself! You didn't let anyone down because you've tried your best to be there as soon as you possibly could! That's all we humans can do and it's ALWAYS more than enough! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! Please NEVER give up HOPE! Try to HANG ON as much as you possibly CAN! I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, WishfulThinker66!
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