I'm so sorry you're going through all of this, Moose72! Please don't worry about "whining" and keep venting as much as you need to and want to! These are all VERY hard things to go through! I'm so sorry, I wish I've had more advice to give to you! I completely agree with what sarahsweets and BirdDancer have already wisely said better than I ever could! I'd suggest to listen to both of them as much as you can! They always give such great advice to everyone like in this case! Please keep us updatedas much as you can and let us know how it goes ! Are there any friends or family members that may help you economically? Anyone at all? I hope things will get better soon for you and your family! Please NEVER give up HOPE! Try to HANG ON as much as you possibly CAN! We ALL care about you! We ALL love you! Feel free to vent and write as much as you need to and want to! You know we'll NEVER judge you! I PROMISE YOU THAT! Remember that we're here for you if you need it! Feel free to PM me anytime! Let me know if I can do something to help you! Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes! I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, Moose72! You don't deserve to suffer AT ALL! Nobody deserves to suffer AT ALL, certainly not such an amazing, caring, kind, sweet and wonderful person LIKE YOU ARE! You're a STRONG, WONDERFUL PERSON! PLEASE ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT!