I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Floralee! I completely agree with what both healingme4me and Bill3 have already wisely said better than I ever could! I'd suggest to you to listen to them as much as you can if you want to! They always give such great, wise, wonderful advice to EVERYONE, like in this case! It was NOT your fault and you did NOTHING wrong! From what you wrote it seems clear that he's struggling with Anziety and several MI issues of his own! That doesn't mean that you did anything wrong towards him! You did everything you could to make this relationship work and you've tried to be nice to him, but HE was the one that decided to break and HE was the one that decided he wasn't ready for it! Please don't be so hard on yourself! Things like this can happen and it's NOT your fault! I'm really happy that you have a support system IRL at least! Please try to spend as much time with the people you love and that who love you back! You ABSOLUTELY deserve it! Remember that we're here for you if you need it! Feel free to PM me anytime! Let me know if I can do something to help you! Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes! I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, Floralee!