[QUOTE=darkside8;6506256]Many comments in hopealwayz thread have mentioned warmth and connection in therapy, and how for some therapists, this is not important, or that this is not the approach they take.

Generally speaking, therapists do need to work on building connection to some degree in order to form a good relationship.

I’m interested however, in relation to the blank slate therapist, what a therapist who really wants to show/build warmth and connection would look like? What do they do, or not do, during the therapy process that makes it clear that they value warmth and connection? (Quote)

I had a therapist who was mainly blank slate (T2). It was a bit like talking to a wall at times, though she did have a certain warmth. Most of what I said she related back to my childhood, or she reflected back to me what I said to her. She almost never said anything relating to her self. Despite this, I really really liked her, but I felt insecure talking to her and I kept trying to make more of a connection and she kept rejecting that, I had to stop seeing her in the end, painfully. My current T is really different. In answer to your question - ‘what does she do to make it clear that she values warmth and connection?’: if I talk about books or the theatre, she gives her own views about the book or another book, she occasionally says personal things about her own experiences in life. She has lent me books, a film that she liked that related to what I talked about, she gave me something for my dog as a transitional object. She shows her personal/ emotional response to the things I say. She says that she thinks about things I say between sessions.