I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, golden_eve! I completely agree with what all the other great, wise, wonderful posters have already wisely said better than I ever could! You've been given lots og reat, wise, wonderful advice on this thread! I'd suggest to follow it as much as you possibly can if you want to! I completely agree with ALL of you when you say that we can't change other people but we CAN change ourselves! It's hard not to let people hurt ourselves with what they do or say, but we have to keep fighting and to try your best! That's all we humans can do after all and it's ALWAYS more than enough! Try not to pay ANY attention to their comments if they hurt you! Most importantly, try to surround yourself ONLY with people who truly love you and respect you for who you truly are! Of course even our closest friends and family members can make some mistakes, but if they truly love us I'm sure they'll apologize whenever that happens! Please try to get away from toxic people in your life! Life is too short and there's no place for them in our lives! It's just self-preservation after all! You need and deserve to take care of yourself first and to surround yourself with people that will truly accept you and truly love you for who you truly are! Life is precious and we DO need to use it as well as we ALL can! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! I feel like that's VERY important! Sending many hugs to you, golden_eve!