Ex-marriage counselor was quite warm and focused a lot on connecting with clients. Some of that was body language and tone of voice, some of it was lots of validation, self-disclosure, joking around, etc. It was very effective for me and I felt quite connected to him and safe with him, though I think it also really fueled my paternal transference.

Current T, who knows ex-MC, has mentioned his (ex-MC's) being "warm and fuzzy" to the point that he's "squishy." T has said that in comparison, he is "caring, but not warm and fuzzy." That seems fairly accurate, but he does show some warmth and/or fuzziness to me at times. It's like I can draw it out of him, in a way (maybe that's a transference/countertransference thing?) But I think his not being over-the-top warm like ex-MC was has helped keep me from developing the same sort of transference for him. He is good at creating and maintaining a connection and rapport though--one way is that he'll joke around with me (which is a way I connect to people). We just sort of "click" in a way that I didn't with ex-T (she was less on building the connection and wasn't particularly warm--well, near the end she was, I guess). He's said before that he thinks the relationship is the biggest determinant of success in therapy, that it's less about the specific methods used (he's cited studies with this finding).