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iliama
Newly Joined
 
Member Since Apr 2019
Location: NY
Posts: 1
5
Unhappy Apr 20, 2019 at 10:43 AM
 
Hi, I am completely new to this forum. I decided to come here for advice. I would like to start off with, as well as bipolar 1 disorder, I have high functioning autism, PTSD, and an eating disorder (which has subsided a lot and I haven't had an episode in a very long time). I am not sure if I am going about recovery the right way. Basically, I have been through extensive trauma, which led me to want to help others and give back. Helping others truly gives me joy, and makes me extremely happy and content. As a result of this, I have begun my journey to start becoming a social worker, and got accepted into a great university. On top of this, I volunteer tutoring inmates and refugees, I work with human trafficking victims on the weekends, I work as a peer specialist, I mentor at risk youth and special needs children, and I am also a suicide hotline worker. I am aware this is a lot, especially being the fact that most of it is volunteer work except for the peer specialist. I don't go to school full time either, I figured I should take it slow and steady so I don't mess anything up. I am only taking one class, as well as working 50 hours a week between volunteering and my actual job. My mom says she misses me and is extremely worried for my mental health. But I feel fine, I love what I do, and it gives me joy and purpose. I don't have friends outside of my work, and I am okay with it (I have always been unable to make friends, maybe due to my autism). When I volunteer and work, I find myself acting in a way I have never acted before, mature, charismatic, and overall the person I've always wanted to be. The people I help make me feel so happy and loved. I would do anything for them. But sometimes I wonder if my lifestyle is wrong. Everyone says I need to focus more on myself, and I think I do enough of that, I exercise and read and eat healthy and meditate. But I still question it. I guess my question is, do you think I should change my lifestyle as well? I am aware its not typical, but I find it very therapeutic and fulfilling. This is the first time in years I haven't been depressed or manic.
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