Warning: *MAY TRIGGER*
New here. I just read this entire thread! Talk about free time.
I am not dx with an ED. However, I thought I'd pass my experience along.
I am dx with schizoaffective disorder- bipolar 1 with pschotic features basically but those features are outside a mood episode.
I recently started exercising and eating less/more nutritionally. Because of the meds Ive taken for bp/sza have ruined my metabolism and Ive gained 60 pounds over the last 14 years. Before I was diagnosed, I was very fit: judo 2/3 times a week, competed... In fact I have pix of me at a competition- it makes me so sad! I was in shape. Now I catch my reflection, and I hate it. I see obese people in public and think "that's how I look..." I purposefully do not look at the scale at the doctor or pdoc.
When I was exercising a lot, I had just lost 60 pounds! Now I feel like I'm starting over. I HAD to go to judo even if I didn't feel well. I restricted food all the time and would only eat certain foods. I would "chew/spit"- chew yummy food but stop short of swallowing and spit it out. I was too lazy to figure out how to make myself throw up. Now, because of the psych meds, I have developed fatty liver disease from having metabolic syndrome: pre-diabetes, high cholesterol, and high triglycerides. I am incredibly upset over this! The first time I lost weight, people would tell me how great I looked. Guys only wanted me for my body. My primary doctor became concerned about my weight as it kept going down- too much. I was also very anemic. I was cold all the time. I'd not eat before judo and once almost fainted in the locker room after class. Or, sometimes, I'd get home from class and binge because I felt so bad. Then I'd feel guilty. Everything I ate had to be compensated for with "the right type" of exercise.
Now, I'm seeing the old patterns creeping back. I am seriously planning to discontinue Rexulti- an antipsychotic- because it causes weight gain. I just went off Seroquel because of weight-gain side effects. Previously, I have taken Depakote and Zyprexa- two psych meds that are notorious for "severe" weight gain. I plan to walk or ride my bike as often as I can (stupid rain) to get a big head start. I see myself restricting already "in the name of health". I can only have certain "healthy" foods. Some days all I eat is granola cereal with a banana. I feel I'm sliding back to my old ways- even if still technically overweight.
Thanks for making it this far!