Honestly, atm - I feel as you. That said, I know there is a way to break through - I did it once. For a couple years. You can too. We both can. We just need to figure out what works for us. The doctors can't always tell us that. Other people can't always tell us that. It sincerely is up to us to do the work to figure it out and then take the neccessary steps. Of course - I am speaking of healthy ways of things that work for us. The things that used to work for me, no longer are - so now I need to find something else. The hard part is not losing hope while searching it out. It took me years last time. Maybe it will again. I don't know. What I do know, is if there is anyway of avoiding it - I won't give up the search .. and to do that, I must not give up life. It is my hope - my prayer - you will do the same. I care about you my friend. I have grown close to you over the years we have known one another. Even though we don't talk often because I was not always here - I think of you often. Never give up. I know you to be strong. Maybe you don't. Especially now when you feel so low .. but you are much stronger than you feel or no. You have such a beautiful soul - you care about so many people. Now is time to care about you too. We all care for you. You are our friend. ❤