My manager organised some social events with food involved. The first one was a whole team meeting. Whilst there, she came over, and it felt like, slammed a plate down in front of me, then said “Why aren’t you eating?’ I expect she thought I was being polite or slow at starting.

The second event was more informal and I managed to eat something in front of her and the others, even though I found it so incredibly difficult to do so.

She had a very close relationship with someone who has a severe ED. I feel awful doing these behaviours around her as it’s been so hard for her, I feel so guilty and wish I could turn off this voice so I could be the respectful person I used to pride myself on being and support her more.

After these socials, I felt my manager was quite withdrawn with me. She doesn’t know I have relapsed but I don’t want work to become strained. I’m not really sure the point of this post, sorry