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saidso
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Member Since Oct 2018
Location: Europe & UK
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Default Apr 22, 2019 at 05:14 AM
 
I liked the beginning of what you wrote, but when you generalised from one incident to "normal people are abusive and mean" I don't agree with your thinking. It's same old the "I" versus "Them" rant. Doesn't get anyone anywhere in my opinion.

I think you are entirely correct in that most people go through challenges in their life and can be momentarily aggressive to strangers as a result of that. I know that I've occasionally been super aggressive to public transport employees when the frustration of commuting took me over.

Yes, we can walk away. We can look for situations where people behave in a more human, open manner. We can walk away to protect from our own triggers (I'm a violence survivor also). I don't idealise "peace" because I grew up in an environment where you had to deal with violence. Emotionally however like you I need a certain amount of healthy human behaviours around me in order to relax and learn about myself.

Finding a way to meet my need to be surrounded by health behaviour is more important than ranting and controlling the behaviour of other people. It's about contacting my own healthy behaviours inside, and letting them help me to connect to healthy other people outside.

All people are limited and sometimes nasty in my opinion. It's easier to expect more from others than I can achieve myself but actively meeting my emotional needs gets me a lot further. Note to self: how can I act in an emotionally healthy way in the next hour/ today???? Eeek….. now that is a challenge.

You write well, have you tried joining a writers' group and sometimes writing/ reading your stuff with other people?

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*"Fierce <-> Reality"*

oh god I am struggling today, help me to remember how to stay connected and human!

remember: the nut shell against human predators and my own fear!
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Thanks for this!
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