I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Abyssanctum! I completely agree with what Skeezyks hars already wisely said better than I ever could! I'd suggest you to listen to him as much as you can if you want to! He always gives SUCH GREAT ADVICE to EVERYONE like in this case! If you feel like you may be suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder, the only way to know for sure is to talk to a doctor about this and see how it goes from there! Hopefully he/she will be able to help you! You DO deserve to get better and to feel good! You deserve to live an happy, fulfilling life just like everyone else does! You DESERVE ALL OF WHAT I'VE JUST SAID and MUCH, MUCH MORE THAN THAT! If the online tests you're taking all point to you possibly suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder it is DEFINITELY something worth looking into! Online tests aren't completely reliable but they CAN offer some indications and suggestions! Yes, you can soffer from Borderline Personality Disorder or any other MI even at a young age! In fact they usually develop at a young age wieh you're a child or a teenager! Please try to get as much help as you can and to reach out to a professional as soon as you can! Borderline Personality Disorder can definitely get WORSE if it goes untreated! Please do this for yourself! It IS your own health we're talking about after all and you DO deserve to get help! You WILL feel better at some point if you try to get help! I'm really happy that you have a support system IRL, but I feel like the help of a professional may be NECESSARY! Please do consider it as much and as soon as you can! YOU DESERVE TO GET BETTER and YOU WILL GET BETTER! Just try to do your best! That's all we humans can do after all and it's ALWAYS more than enough! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! Remember that we're here for you if you need it! Feel free to PM me anytime! Let me know if there's ANYTHING, ANYTHING AT ALL that WE can do to HELP YOU OUT! We'll ALL be VERY HAPPY to help you! Just mention it and we'll do EVERYTHING we can to help you! I PROMISE YOU THAT! Please keep us updated as much as you possibly CAN! We DO want to know how things will go for you and if you'll feel better and what you'll decide to do! WE ALL CARE ABOUT YOU! WE ALL LOVE YOU! Feel free to VENT and WRITE as much as you NEED TO and WANT TO! WE'LL NEVER JUDGE YOU! I PROMISE YOU THAT! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! I'm so sorry you're going through ALL OF THIS! You don't deserve to suffer AT ALL! Nobody deserves to suffer AT ALL, certainly not such a CARING, KIND, GENEROUS , GENTLE , STRONG, WISE and WONDERFUL person like YOU ARE! You're a STRONG, WONDERFUL PERSON! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! I hope things will get better SOON for you! Please NEVER give up hope! Try to HANG ON as much as you possibly CAN! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! WISH YOU GOOD LUCK! LET US KNOW HOW IT GOES! I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, Abyssanctum!