hi everyone i don't really know why im posting this.
i guess i'm just so lonely and don't know how to better it or myself and cant seem to find connection with anyone around me /not even really the people i'd call friends.

i feel like maybe connecting with ppl who feel the same might help for me, so i guess that's why i'm here.. not sure.

i've been dealing with depression for like ten years now i guess and everytime when i think im at the lowest of the low points, it will just feel even worse some time after. i'm in i think one of the worst moods ever at the moment, just so clueless, self-hating, insecure, not knowing who i am, so flipping lonely, no support system, and recently moved into a new house with an unknown roommate who always seems to have people visiting and sleeping in our living room for months on end.

at home i just wan't to be alone i guess, but never am, but i want to do things with others outside, but don't have the right people to do it with. there's just so much going on that i don't even really know where to start and don't really see how things will ever get better i i just don't know what to do.

im sorry for posting this here, and i dont want sympathy i just want i dont even know what i want i just want to feel better, and be able to make friends so please share any tips you have or what has helped you pull through it or anything if you want. im sorry and thank you