Welcome to the addictions forum, and well done on making the first step of admitting you have a problem and are looking for help.

Based on what you've said, "getting shakes" it's probably not safe for you to quit cold Turkey. You're going to need help with detox. So I'd suggest starting with your family Dr., and asking about detox, and ideally treatment options. You've been drinking a long time, so treatment will likely give you the tools you need to learn to live sober. It doesn't have to be residential, there are a lot of good outpatient programs, some even run in the evening so you can keep working, although personally I wouldn't recommend it.

As for self help groups, there's a world outside of AA. AA wasn't for me either. There's also SMART recovery, which is based on CBT and I have lots of friends who go to those meetings and love them. For women, there's also women for sobriety, which has IRL meetings some places but not all that many, but they have a very robust web site that hosts chats several times a day.

Good luck, and keep us posted on how you're doing.

splitimage