The above post was a good last post. Sort of wanted to set the record straight about my son. On many occassions, I didn't admit how bad he treated me and all of my reactions to it. Raising children can be heartbreaking. Accounts fade into the background a bit when you delete them. That is what I want right now. Trying to work more though I feel guilty about that with what happened with my children. Not proud. Still trying to make amends, am taking my medication and hope that by working, I am being a better example for my children. I have been working more closely with my husband which will hopefully help. Maybe some of my posts might help someone dealing with something similiar. Moving on. Hoping that my family has a "win" soon. (Reallly don't like the username Nowinners.) Wish everyone the best.