Aw, BirdDancer. I am so sorry that you're having these struggles. Feeling disconnected or lacking solid friendships can exacerbate the unpleasant feelings associated with mental health problems....a tough cycle.

My instinct, just based on your overall post, would be that perhaps it is not a great idea for you to meet with that particular friend. I always reply to people's messages so I would say something like "What a lovely offer, thanks for asking but my schedule is full. Hope you and your family are enjoying spring! Best wishes."

You sound like you are in a very vulnerable place right now (me too) and so I think self-protection may be the priority particularly as something does sound a bit off with that particular woman. I'd say when you are feeling stronger, you could stretch you wings by looking into some volunteering opportunities or joining a "Meet Up" group. Perhaps those could be ways to more comfortably and safely connect with others? Perhaps you need a fresh start with some friends you have not yet met?

Wishing you peace, hope, and a bright future. Do something nice for yourself today (If you ever need a hug or a cheer-up, feel free to PM me)