Hello princesuxx: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central. The membership, here on PC, is primarily consumers of mental health services, not professionals. And we cannot offer mental health diagnoses or meditations-related advice. It is possible some other members may have had similar experiences to yours. And, if so, they may wish to share their experiences. However, if professional opinions are what you're seeking, I'm afraid that is something you won't find here on PC. Still there is a lot of support that can be available here. So I hope you will consider sticking with us & that you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.