Another hard day, I am trying to get motivated but it's so hot outside and inside. I know I am using that as an excuse, I am dreading the topic for this week. I have to confront my own whiteness. I want to believe that race has little impact, but that isn't the case and it's really tough to read. In fact I took an antianxiety med to see if that will help me study. Otherwise, I don't know what to do. My heart just isn't in this, could it be a depressive episode coming on or just the results from my addiction rearing it's ugly head.