Hey guys,
Recently I gone out of control on food. I will eat and eat until I feel stuffed and uncomfortable, privately.
I will go down to kitchen in the midnight when everyone is sleeping just to get that piece of chocolate or the slice of bread, or any things is on the table or in the fridge...
I feel so shameful of my behavior.. that I am not enjoying my food but forcing myself to swallow it. I hate it. But I still reach for that cake.
I had bulimia before. I no longer purge now but sometimes I feel like purging all out. But I always tell myself don’t ... don’t punish yourself.
So ended up I looking up on diet pills. Or detox stuff. I’m currently taking it. Which I dream for it to help me curb my appetite and I realize. It’s not about the diet pills. It’s me myself, I feel full after taking it, but I still want to eat, and I force myself to eat even though I am full !! It’s my mind !!
I just need someone to share with, to motivate each other on my recovery path....
No more self harming, but more love to myself...