Thank you so much everyone for your advice. It went down today. They told me I am getting a one dollar raise. I felt good about it, but also dissatisfied because as I have got to know the new hire, I am more sure that I “deserve” to be paid equally to her, especially since she would not be doing more advanced tasks than me (at least I don’t see how that would be possible). P.s., i like her a lot and think she is smart and will do a fine job. I really really like her.

Part of me wanted to let it go and be happy with the one dollar raise. The other part of me is feeding my family from the food bank and cannot afford all our needs. I felt like it was the right time to ask for more, because I need it, and because honestly I do not think my morale could survive all these tasks that keep being put on me, while training someone “under me” who is getting paid more than me. I had to scrap hard to learn what I know and honestly... I would feel disheartened spoon feeding her everything I know while she gets paid more than me at the same time. ugh. Trying not to be petty, but I’m not sure anyone has low enough self worth to deal with that. I was starting to look for new jobs last night and started picturing myself in maybe a better place. I am loyal, but I have to be appreciated if I work this hard for a company. I care so much about my tasks that I work at home on my own time to research rules, etc. I dream about work, think about my job all the time when I am not even there. I try to keep track of everything. They have fired the last three people that worked there, and two before that quit, and a few before that quit or were let go. They can’t keep a team in place.

I pointed out to the bosses that I have been very reliable and dedicated and give my all, and I saw how much they are paying her, and asked that they pay me equally to do equal work.

The boss’s return email did not go well. He told me he was disappointed in my email, and he didn’t think I would do such a thing, and basically I exploited them by asking at this time. He said they pay her more because she will be a “star” once she is trained. He said that if I want to go work somewhere else that pays better, or somewhere I am happier, than they won’t hold me back.

I sobbed in the bathroom for ten minutes. No one could hear me, don’t worry.

I responded as professionally as possible, and did not let the smears gets to me. I set the record straight on a couple things, and stood by my request. I pointed out that I am a star employee.

It was a bitter battle, and I don’t feel like I won anything except a more damaged psyche at the moment, but, he ended up giving me $20, if “that works for me.” I took it. Still a bit less than my coworker but they wore me down. My boss said that basically he will overlook my impropriety because we are professionals and will move past it. Also, he said that my home life probably influenced my request (they know very very little about how difficult my home life is right now, and has been for near a year straight). He thought that was a mitigating factor to my brutal selfish exploitative insolence. Excuse my embellishment. He did end up saying that they appreciate me and don’t want to lose me. I believe that, somewhat. I apologized that I did not get what I requested/needed in a way that he respects, but said I will hold my head up and do a great job for the company. I expressed that hopefully there would be no resentment going forward. My other boss was much kinder along the way and did express her appreciation for the work I do there and acknowledged how hard I work. She said she has no resentment at all and thanked me. She relies on me in more substantive ways than him, although I do more busy work for him.

Anyway. I feel awful about how it went down, but it’s good too. Thank you for your help and attention.