Thank you for your reply. I'm not seriously contemplating suicide, but I have been having some thoughts about it recently. Perhaps my new psychiatrist and new medications will help deal with that particularly. I'm hopeful that when I return to work I'll be able to survive long enough on the night shift to find a new job, which could take a while. I only hope that the economy doesn't crash in the time that comes. I have a second income (writing) but it's only a few hundred dollars a month which isn't enough to live off.