So I'm stuck with an adult sibling who still acts like a childish bully. One behavior I demanded she stop was barging into my room at night when I'm in bed and she just did it again.

That wouldn't be too bad if she was a normal person who wakes you up to tell you something important in a normal tone of voice. But my sister, who I think is a narcissist, always enters my room talking loudly in a voice that sound like shouting and laughing at the same time. It's as if she is still a spoiled child who expects people to find her cute and funny when she behaves innappropriately. To make matters worse, I have a dog with a medical condition who shouldn't be agitated. When an idiot bursts into our bedroom at night making a lot of noise, it startles my dog from sleep so that he jumps up and starts barking. Every time I tell her to keep her voice down and not alarm my dog, she yells viciously at my dog to shut up and continues yapping herself in a loud obnoxious voice.

When I told her for the hundredth time to stop barging into my bedroom at night and shouting, she accused me of always doing the exact same thing. I only ever wake her up for time sensitive matters becase the lazy b**** sleeps until late afternoon and other peoole expect do business during normal hours. I have never barged into the narcissist's bedroom while she was asleep in the middle of the night, but it is the narcissist's way of saying "You do it all the time" when confronted with her unacceptable behavior. The truth is that every time she sleeps in later than usual, I start hoping she had a heart attack and died. I spend a few hours magining having a life without a toxic sister and then I feel disappointed when she gets up later.

I'm just really mad and I wanted to vent because I'm frustrated. I would move out if I could but I don't have the means right now so please no more people advising me to get out. If we all had the money or means to solve our problems no one would be talking about their problems here. Lack of money and family obligations are as real obstacles as mental illnesses and other things that you don't have control over. I find it offensive when people trivialize my situation by saying I am choosing to be abused by not moving out and magically finding a new job and a place to live.

Once I posted in a different forum that I was frustrated because my sibling/housemate was such a slob that I had to spend a lot of time cleaning up after her. And someone who seemed like a moderator there told me to read up on co-dependancy because I clean up after a filthy family member. I only clean up after her because I can't live with dog feces and urine on the floor (she wouldn't housebreak her dog properly) or watch her trample expensive items that she left on the floor when we were broke. She used up so many dishes and utensils preparing her dog's special meals that the sinks were full of rotting food even though I washed as many dishes as I could. She just used whatever dishes and utensils I washed and threw them back in the sink. For a while I even stashed a few clean dishes in my bedroom so I wouldn't have to wash a cup every time I was thirsty from doing yardwork alone.

Lately I have been insisting more that she clean up after herself and her pet. She responded with a lot of name calling and false accusations but then started helping out a bit so I thought things were getting better. Then I told her to keep her voice down if she has to come in my room at night and its back to full narcissistic hate mode with insults and accusations.

This is not what I meant to say, but when I post about my living situation I always dread people telling me to leave as if I choosing to stay in a horrible situation on purpose. I just want to remind people that lots of people are unable to leave abusive situations for real reasons. Sometimes I just want to vent about the unfairness of it without being patronized by overly simple solutions like "just leave." Other circumstances that I shouldn't talk about in a public forum makes leaving complicated and irresponsible right now so I'd appreciate it if people take me at my word when I say I'm trapped I hate my situation. I'm tired of having to explain myself every time someone offers that thoughtless suggestion as if I have not been wracking my brians for a way out and trying to hide away money or find a better job.

I'm tired and I should stop ranting now. At least I'm not suicidal when I'm pissed. I want to slam that narcissist in her place every time she tried to invade my personal boundaries again. Since I can't leave I'm going to claim my space.

Thank you for reading my crazy 3 Am angry post.