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Xynesthesia2
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Member Since Mar 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 540
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Default Oct 10, 2019 at 01:43 PM
 
As you know, some of your posts on the Psychotherapy thread caught my attention. So I decided to see what other sorts of things you post here. (FYI, it would not be easy to trace my history on PC in a similar way as I closed my account with years of posting a while ago, and the current one is... well, more current and limited.)

I just wanted to respond to this and say that, IMO, you are already a terrific writer! One reason I was drawn to your posts on the other forum: they are not only very rich in interesting and valuable information but are also heartfelt and expressed very well - very clear, thoughtful, logical and graphic in ways that do not disturb but have an effect to draw in someone who loves depth and quality

I tend to be super conscious and sometimes paranoid about my writing as well. What adds to it is that English is not my first language, and I never feel confident enough that I can master it well enough in the ways I would like to. It is my language of preference now, both spoken and written (over my mother tongue), but I always carry a certain level of insecurity and self-doubt that I could ever use it in a way that aligns with my internal standards. I know that I have a good affinity for this language (studied a few other languages as well before)... also for appropriate grammar and using words and descriptions meaningfully in any language. I won competitions in essay writing and grammar in my childhood, in my first language. In other words, I know I am naturally articulate and am often praised for it. Native English speakers now often use me as an editor or to write essays from scratch. Still, there is always self-doubt. I am not sure about you - for me, it stems from some very high standards regarding quality, accuracy and precision. Part of me loves to have these standards because it calls for continuous improvement, but part of me does not like it so much because I often procrastinate due it, I withhold my input, expressions and publications due to feeling it is not good and complete enough yet. Also, I have lived in the US now for many years, and previously in the UK, and I often hate that I have an accent to my speech that I just cannot shred.

What I've found the most (mentally) helpful is to get external feedback on my writing. >90% of the time it is abundantly positive and encouraging, which counters my sometimes delusional and overly self-critical feelings that cause stagnation and creative blocks. Practically, I really don't think I need much help and can improve my vocabulary, grammar, style etc via quality reading books and articles, which is already my first favorite activity anyway.

As you can see, I also tend to be quite verbose... but I have many opportunities that actually force me to be succinct and make better, focused, more linear and easier summaries. Maybe exercise writing limited-word abstracts or tailoring your thought to different kinds of audiences. In any case, I mostly just wanted to say (after this ramble) that I like what I have seen of your writing style a lot. Depth and examining issues from many different angles just cannot come in 5-10 sentences usually! And being so sensitive to quality won't make it easier to accept the flaws. It opens up our complex abilities and strengths though to coming up with really unique, innovative analyses and discussions! A continued desire to improve is great as well, IMO al least
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Thanks for this!
TunedOut, unaluna