Really don't know what to do now. My partner has broken up with the guy she was seeing and has again offered to not pursue polyamory because she doesn't want to keep causing me pain, but I then feel selfish because that is restricting her freedom - she is not my property and I don't want her to feel she has to limit herself just for me. I think over time that is not healthy for our relationship and would lead to resentment and more guilt on my part. The problem here is we both love each other so each of us wants to do what is best for the other, even at our own expense, but obviously that is not possible. I'm hoping there must be some middle ground; from reading threads in Poly fora I can see these issues are not uncommon but people get through them. I just have the added issue of complex trauma.