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GordenLing
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Member Since: Nov 2019
Location: NY
Posts: 6
3 yr Member
Default Nov 15, 2019 at 06:40 AM
 
Hello lady411,

It sounds like a pretty rough situation. I am sorry to hear you are going through all this. You sound like a pretty self-aware person so I commend you for this. You're point about seeing where the future is heading without a therapist is very insightful too.

It sounds like there is a lot of tension and without a change in course it is possible the relationship will only go further downhill. As you stated, going to a therapist would be one way to try to change things up.

Just a thought, have you ever sat down to discuss these concerns with your husband? Pride and honor plays a very big role for many men. A private conversation between you two may really help the situation. Verbal abuse can many times be a way for men to act out due to subconscious power struggles. He may not mean to hurt you emotionally, just establish some control.

You mentioned you both disagree on certain parenting strategies. This seems to come out and affect you both - but also your kids. Kids need to see consistency between their parents as a whole and consciously or subconsciously I believe you both know that. A serious discussion over a nice night out or even at home can go a long way to help create some compromises between you two.

While these ideas are definitely not a quick fix to the overall issue they can definitely help. You both have a long process ahead of you to repair the relationship but if you both try to work on it the benefits will start to show pretty fast.

All the best,
GordenLing
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Thanks for this!
Iloivar, lady411