I have recently been communicating more than I used to (this was “always” “strongly discouraged” - at “best”)

I am quite sure I was programmed by various abusers in early childhood how “Wrong” it was to give “too much information” - or basically any information.. about how I am feeling, how the family is feeling, basically anything about the family aside from some strictly controlled and programmed nuggets. And if I did not “comply” .. it was Wrong.

Can anyone relate to having a very controlling “family of origin” and how uncovering more about this can be illuminating. And even being allowed to speak can be a taste of “freedom” which was not allowed during childhood ... I don’t need to be told to “move on” since that is the response I received in real life (with no input as to how to “move on” - simply further disconnection, disinterest, disinformation, and (maybe intentional) confusion. I could write more but in this moment I don’t have time.

Respect to all who read this and who can relate to posts in this forum.