At some point you have to come to a place of acceptance. If you don't the past will forever own you. Moving forward doesn't mean forgetting the whole thing ever happened. No one advocates that. What has to happen if you want your life back is an acknowledgement that the abuse is reality. It can't be undone. However, learning to live along side of it should be your goal. It's there. You wish it weren't. However, if you want it to be the only defining feature in your life, that's a huge mistake for you. It cripples you.